Hell Mouth

I am interested in Latin culture.  There are many authors in Latin America that are translated into English.  Most famous of all were Castaneda and Ruiz.  There is western yoga like there is Eastern yoga.  Aztec Yoga is all about Sex and the Sacred.

Lust is not the most evil thing in life.  On the contrary, it is the best.  Love and Lust are two things, but you need both to be a good human being.  The light is love, and the flesh is lust.  So love is an emotion, and sex is just gratification of the body.

But as long as we are alive, we need to balance between love and lust.  You have a body, so you need to eat and sleep and bathe and all that.  And we have a spirit so we need love and emotions and wisdom and knowledge.

God is Love, and the Devil is Lust.  But don't pretend like you are not lusty.  We are animals.  Life begins at the root chakra with food, sex, and aggression.  And as you go up the spine, it ends with the crown chakra and enlightenment and Oneness.  So kundalini yoga is the real self realization.  It is becoming your full potential.

So when I see porn, I don't feel ashamed.  Every woman has sex for money.  By 15 or 16, women realize that their vagina is a commodity.  A woman can get something with her sexuality.  Nobody pays men for sex.  Even male strippers are just pretty boys doing a fantasy business.  So women have more value than men.

The aesthetics of porn is all about what we secretly value.  The main thing, no kidding, is the penis next to the woman's face.  These two things are the most beautiful things in the world.  And the ejaculation is called, 'the moneyshot' because that is what people pay to see.  The most ridiculous moneyshot is in the woman's mouth.

So sex is just about lust and expression of rage.  We are animals who think.  First thing is self defense, eating, and fucking.  If you can't do anything else, just sit around at home cooking and eating.  The root chakra is the animal part of the human being, but a human being can go beyond the animal kingdom.  That is why any human birth is fortunate.  We are better than dogs or monkeys or whatever.

I find the Latinas and Asians the most interesting.  Latin women are great at sex and very lusty.  Asian women are submissive and servile.  I am not a big fan of white and black and all that.

This post is not about porn or lust.  It is about what we see in porn.  There is an aesthetic to it.  And between porn and art is erotica.  Erotica is art about lust and sex.  

What I am trying to say is, lust is a part of life and you have to accept you are part beast before you move on to the higher realms.

Lowered Expectations

You can't go forcing something if it's just not right.  I learned this from a freakin Green Day song.  You cannot beat the Truth.  The truth is immutable.  Since it has power, it can be used to help or to hurt.  But a good man uses the truth to help and the a ninja uses the truth to hurt.  So I contrast the virtues of the Samurai and the Ninja.  Let us begin

I was not meant to work a freakin day job.  I have two college educations and it doesn't help me at all.  My education in acupuncture gave me a theoretical understanding of health and nutrition and disease prevention.  And my education in graphic design gave me a fun hobby to pass the time and express creative energy.  But if you cannot monetize these skills, it doesn't matter.

I have been doing guitar since 1995 and wrestling since 1989 and grappling since 1998.  You are your experiences.  You learn by doing.  Theoretical knowledge is almost useless.  So my hobbies became my profession, and my education became my hobbies.  So aha, my philosophy wins again.  Reversal is the movement of the Tao.  Things flow from extreme yin to extreme yang, and when you embody harmony, you embody God's virtues of balance, integrity, moderation, and humility.  Androgyny is the sacred state.

So like I once heard from a karate teacher, life comes full circle.  By 1995, I was a zen master, a hunchback, and a musician,  and 25 years later, I return to the original face.  All my educations didn't even help me, it doesn't matter.  Martial arts, medicine, nutrition, art, writing, the strippety strip, some odd jobs, a mean fish curry, etc... these skills are almost useless.  I never had to work to support myself, so I had a lot of free time to develop hobbies.

The secret to raising good kids is to make them learn for themselves.  When you give someone something free, you enable them.  When you teach them how to do it for themselves, you empower them.  And parents who don't love their children will ruin their children's psychology.

A mother should lift her son up, a father should enforce discipline.  It should not be the other way around.  This is why homosexuals and lesbians and transgenders and adoptive parents are all wrong people.  The family unit is the premise of society.  A man should be a strong king, but be merciful.  A woman should embody love and caring but be strong enough to preserve boundaries.  And children should not rebel against their own parents.  In the USA, it is a punk youth culture.  But in China, they follow the family tradition.  But you will find in the end, that you cannot change your genetics.  You will probably be the same height as your father, have the same talent, and work in the same profession.  A father who doesn't give his son a business to inherit is a bad father.  My father lost his mind 30 years ago, and became a bizarre madman fighting and fighting and never winning and never admitting defeat.  

I realize I am in a diminished state.  I can only do what I can do.  My educations didn't help me.  And my three hobbies of judo, music, and cooking are the only things I can monetize.  The great thing about knowledge is that it is power, and once you master a field, you can teach it to others and empower the youth.  I like teaching kids.

When you stay at home, you just wallow in your own delusions.  If you cannot socialize, you cannot work.  That is why autism is a kind of disability.  People with no guile can't succeed in business, because business is about deception not who is objectively better.  

I like playing guitar, cooking meals at home, and doing different combat sports.  I have experience in boxing, and judo and sambo and shootfighting.  I see Muay Thai as flailing bitches and BJJ as a poor derivitive of judo.  The more classical a martial art is, the more efficient a technique and the more it is based on brawling and competition the more it is just punk aggression.  That why I don't like MMA.  It is sloppy strikers vs sloppy grapplers.   You will learn someday that boxing is better than wrestling, and Kung Fu and Aikido is reality martial art.  Most street situations involve weapons, so nobody goes to the ground.  In a situation without weapons, the shoot immediately.  If you shoot on a man with a knife, he will just cut your throat.  

All martial arts were developed in Ancient Greece and they knew boxing is better than wrestling and MMA.  Pankration was essentially the pro wrestling of Ancient Greece.  And the Eastern people took the ball and ran with it.  The Chinese dont have the congential essence to create anything new.  They did not invent kung fu, buddhism, qi gong, computer engineering, the bible, or anything else.  Even TCM is loosely based on Ayurveda.  But since they are dutiful humble people, they borrow ideas from other cultures and take the ball and run with it.  China borrows from India, the same way British musicians borrowed rock n roll from southern blacks.  

So what I am saying is, I am coming to grips with reality.  I must accept where I am at.  I realize my parents didn't do the wrong things, but I must take responsibility for my actions.  Negligence is a crime, and corrupting a youth is a tragedy.  I can live in a diminished state until it is my ordained time.

You will learn some day that you cannot change your time of birth or death.  When you are born and die is a matter of fate.  But whether you are successful and happy and married and beloved is your own doing.  You have volition, you can take action.  

So since I mastered judo, music, and cooking, I can teach these skills to others.  I simply want to leave behind a legacy.  I know I have done some wrong and some good.  But all I want is vindication.  My favorite thing is playing guitar, and I cook some mean vegetarian food.  And I can always dream of the glory days at the dojo.  

So all is not lost.  I remember fondly all my high school teachers.  Most of all, I remember a good high school phys ed coach and a good music teacher.  And I gained some skills in art and writing.   Those were the days.  But I am not Al Bundy and I cannot live in the past.  I will not make any derogitory remark about Ed O'neil because he is blackbelt.  And I am blue belt, so he is more advanced in grappling.

I am a humble loser with a lot of talent.  I can live out my days in peace, and just be satisfied with what I have.  If I can't do self defense, I can pick up a shank.  If I can't get free sex, I can hire some help.  If I can't be a rockstar, I can play my tunes for myself.  Young people should learn to not give up.  If you can't do one thing, do something else.  But just don't give up.  If you can't do boxing, do kickboxing.  If you can't be a wrestler, be a judoka.  If you can't be a rockstar, play guitar at the church.  You are never out of the game until you are dead in the grave.  So as long as you are alive, you have a chance to win.  If you strive in a real way, in accordance with your talents in a realistic way, you will succeed eventually.  And in the end, you will learn that there is no success.  The meaning of life is simply to be happy and useful.

In conclusion, I just want to live a humble life, teach what I know, and live out my years in peace.  

Looks and Money

I feel compelled to write this.  Women these days are hard to please.  In America, they are very demanding and expect a lot out of a man.  They want looks and money.  If  man doesn't have a full head of hair, a six pack, a 6 inch cock, a 100,000 in the bank, drives a nice sports car, has a freakin day job, etc... he is not a contender.

I don't like high price women.  I feel all women are losers, and the best women are humble losers.  By nature, any man is better than any woman.  And there is no such thing as a transgender.  Amongst primitive creatures like Portuguese fighting fish, there is cases of males becoming females and females becoming males.  But this is amongst simple animals.

The mythology of Hinduism is based on science.  The first avatar was a simple turtle like creature in the primordial waters.  The last avatar will be Kalkin, the preserver of Truth.  Some say Buddha, the 8th avatar, was an evil incarnation of God who taught wrong religious views like no soul and no reality.

The meaning of life is simply to keep living.  If you want to die, you are a loser.  That is why suicide is considered a crime in the USA.  You are mudering yourself.  Sex is about carring on the genome.  Self Defense is about survival and victory.  Eating is about nourishing yourself.  The root chakra oversees food, sex, and aggression.  That is where you start.

But as you move put the chakras, you end in the crown chakra.  This governs enlightenment and being in touch with the universe.  

Women want looks and money.  Nobody gets free sex.  The reason why high school girls fuck for free is that they live in their parents home so they don't pay rent money.  The reason why children fight without weapons is because their hands are slow and they want to prove their better.  And kids listen to rock n roll because it excites them and makes them want to dance.

I don't like American women.  Most of them are overweight, they are fake looking, they are conceited, and they are deceptive.  In a society where you must hustle to make money, sex is a commodity, and the more beautiful you are the more valuable you are.

But I value different things in women.  I like sincerity, humility, honesty, self reliance, and courage.  These are not typical qualities in a woman.  Most women have no courage and are not honest.

I don't go to bars because that is not where the fun is.  The worst fighters, lovers, musicians, and chefs are at a bar.  I can beat anybody in any bar in new york city.  I am a better musician than anyone in current pop music.  I possess a ten inch cock.  And my home cooking is better than anything I ever tasted at a restaurant.  They use extremely low quality oils and salts in restaurants in order to maximize profit margins.

What I am trying to say is, Reversal is the Movement of the Tao.  People compensate for what they don't have.  In a society where you must be number one or nobody, you talk like you are number one but in your heart you know you are nobody.  This is called the Active compensation mechanism.  You try to pretend to be what you are not.  The reason why I never leave the house is because I don't like the world.  My home cooking is better than restaurant food.  I enjoy playing guitar better than going to a noisy nightclub.  I want peace and feel threatened by punk ass dudes in baggy pants with the hat backwards.  I make friends with anyone around me.  I am a quiet homebody.

I don't like the world.  I don't like most women.  I see no value in money.  I see the TV as being fake ass bullshit.  The world seems to be an illusion.  When you realize the world is an illusion, it doesnt affect you anymore.  When you become conscious, you can solve your problems.   

So I do not like American women.  If I visited Europe, women would approach me at the metro station.  European women are much more easy than American women.  And Christianity died in Europe in the mid 19th century.  They don't even pretend to have morality anymore.   You can see pornography on the newstands in France or Germany.  But America keeps its integrity, that is why America is better.

So I do not want to travel to Europe or Africa.  I just want to stay local and get to know my little corner of the world.  Long Island girls are all pretty good.  They are fit and toned but a bit overweight because they eat too many cinnabons.  But country will grow.

So I must learn to manipulate female psychology and win dates.  Most women are strippers and pornstars.  They just don't walk around saying it.  Most people over 18 have tact and restraint.

I love fighting and keep my integrity til judgement day.  The more danger there is, the more excitement there is.  Because crisis means opportunity.  When there is chaos, there is a chance to both win and lose.  So if you stay at home all day, you accomplish nothing, and if you go out and try, you are bound to win one out of ten times even if you are totally random.

So I will enjoy my home life and strive to improve my position outside the home.

The West is in Decline

I am sad to see it go.  Even in my small narrow view of martial arts and music, I see the world is declining.  We are approaching judgement day.  I started guitar and grappling in the 90s and I see the world is not improving, it is degrading.

Physically, we are bigger and fluffier and faster than ever, but morally and spiritually, we are losing our edge.  Boxing is more classy than MMA.  Blues music is more classy than Porno.  This generation is addicted to Porno and MMA and it is ruining them.  It is not just entertainment.  One Greek philosopher said, 'A society can be judged by how it spends it's leisure time.'  This society is debased.

In an open market economy, you must be sneaky and learn the game quick.  In a situation where it is every man for himself, learn to survive.  By the age of 18, you are no longer a minor and can be kicked out of your parent's home to fend for yourself.  Grow up fast not slow.

The west is in decline and we are approaching Judgement Day.  I like showbusiness and feel I could have been somebody.  But I never served in the military or police, never was a famous musician or actor.  Things didn't turn out the way I thought they would.

I wrote about this in a previous post about how things went from Muhammed Ali to Mike Tyson and John Lennon to Kurt Cobain.  Even in 20 or 30 years things quickly degrade.  So the JudeoChristian worldview is accurate, every generation gets worse not better and you cannot be greater than your father.  You may be physically better, but you are morally more crapulent.

So I am heavy in heart and look forward to death.  I can enjoy my last few years on earth and be in peace.  I like music and poetry and zen and morality.  I also like the basic things like food and sex and self defense.  Those are basic things common to all humans. 

I am now working on a new album which I will have ready by Labor Day.  So I must do it all this month.  And I want to publish another book by the end of 2020.  My album will be called, 'Rhythm and Blues World Service' and the book will be called, 'Health, Strength, and Self Defense'.  My music is about preserving the old rhythm and blues and my books are about wholistic health and nutrition. 

So I am resigned in the face of death.  It doesn't matter to me.  There is no success.  If we are all mortal, then God is better than any man who ever lived.  And I think I am the best man.

So life is not perfect, but I must accept what is.  I endured a lot, experienced a lot, and feel better than ever.  I can't do self defense, but I can do combat and survival.  I can't get free sex, but I can go to the strippety strip.  And I play my own version of rock n roll and dream of things that could have been. 

When you are in high school, it is all about free sex and self defense and rock n roll.  And then you go to college and transition in to adult life.  And then you are in the real world, and the real world is all about money and women.  Money is worldly value and women love money. 

So I must fight the good fight til I'm done.

Music and Porn

In one case, you turn the volume up, in the other, you turn the volume down.  Nobody wants to hear the moaning.

I use both porno and music on a daily basis.  I see music as a medicine and porno as a drug.  Music heals your emotions, porno is a dose of fantasy in a cruel, harsh world. 

I listen to rhythm and blues, delta blues, rock n roll, and pop music.  I like most of all the music of the 1950s and how it led to the music of the 1960s.  This was the climax of western civilization, the height of the American empire, and the beginning of the end.

In porno, I love the moneyshot.  It is not a porno if you don't see the actor ejaculate.  Without the moneyshot, it is just a study of human reproduction.  It's the moneyshot and everything else.

So my life goes on, and I do what I must do to get what I want to get.  Business before pleasure.  I do all kinds of work, get all kinds of paychecks, just to get more music and porn.  That is where the fun is.

I admire boxing but think it is too hardcore.  And Hollywood and MMA is crap.  That is not my kind of entertainment.

When I was young, before 30, I was obsessed with Greco Roman Wrestling and Judo.  The legendary photos of Olympic grapplers excited me.  It is like real life wrestlemania. 

But I am not a kid anymore.  So the beat goes on, and I move on.  I do what I must do.  Work is not pleasant, but I do it because it is duty.  When you are done doing what you must do, do you have the energy to do what you want to do?  That is the question you must ask yourself.

Music and Sport

I am learning to distinguish between reality and fantasy.

My two educations were in Acupuncture and Graphic Design.  A typical acupuncturist in this part of the world makes 100 dollars per hour.  A typical graphic designer makes 15 or 16 per hour.  The difference between a licensed profession and typical office work. 

But now, Acupuncture is no longer an option.  I don't even have an active license anymore.  I have a graphic design job, so I am an actively working graphic designer.  It is a good career path.

The main thing in work is trading time for money.  It is a lot like high school and college.  You are rewarded for good behavior, consistency, and conformity.  They want you to do what they say.  It is not that hard to make and spend money.

So Graphic Design is my job.  But what I really love is my hobbies.  I have been doing guitar since 1995 and grappling since 1998.  I spent 5 years doing Shootfighting, 15 years doing judo, and 6 months doing sambo.  I also have boxing experience.  I am a trained combat athlete.  The belt rank and medals mean nothing, it matters that you have sparring experience and the conditioning of a trained fighter.  85% of men can't fight.

So I have a job, two hobbies, and I have enough money to get by.  Now that I have a good paying gig, it will lead to others.  It is called building your resume.  When one job is about to end, start looking for another one.  When you find a near ideal job, then you stay there a few years.  But I just do graphic design for the money, if there was no money involved, I wouldn't do it.

But this it the real world.  Without money, you don't get to enjoy any worldly power or pleasure.  Money is power, women are pleasure.  You need both, unless you are a Buddhist monk in a monastery.  They don't enjoy much power and pleasure. 

I have 5 albums on YouTube and Spotify.  I listen to my own music a lot.  I think it is genius.  People don't really listen to rhythm and blues and rock n roll much anymore.  But I sound like what I listen to, and I listen to the old stuff.  I don't like hip hop and heavy metal.  I see the black hip hop music as having more creativity in it, but I am not from the Bronx so it doesn't interest me.

I can also do judo in a diminished capacity since when I was in my twenties.  Since 2008, people don't do doubles and singles anymore.  Without leg attacks, I can't really wrestle. I am a te-guruma expert.

Now that I am older, past 40, I am middle aged and more mature.  I think boxing is better than judo.  I think the music industry is better than Hollywood.  I think porno and MMA is not showbusiness, but a kind of drug you can get addicted to.  I am into reality not fantasy.  Americans have distorted values and the media is too liberal and anti-Christian and anti-Semitic.  Jews are always outcasts wherever they go, which shows how holy they are.

This world is worthless and the whole premise of the Hindu lifestyle is to be in the world but not of it.  As long as we have physical bodies, we are prisoners.  At least while you are alive, you can enjoy what you can enjoy and do the right thing.  Part of life is work.  Doing productivity for others not just yourself.  There is no life without work.  But when you are done with work, then you have the money and time to do what you really want to do.

I like music and sport.  Rhythm and Blues and Judo.  It is a bit old fashioned but I like it.  I don't like boxing and hip hop.  I am not a Jamaican guy from Brooklyn.  I'm a Syosset Jew.  But don't hold it against me.

So as time goes on, I will do what I must do to get to what I want to do.  If you were smart, you would check out my music on YouTube and Spotify.  It is free to you and it makes me 7 dollars for every 1000 streams.  It is old-fashioned music, but some people like this stuff.  At the very least, it is an exploration of the music of the climax.  The 1960s was a time when white kids and black kids were brought together with music.  Nowadays, black and white is more segregated than ever. 

If you believe the media, it is white overclass and black underclass and Arabs are the enemy.  But this is just a delusion of the media.  They are lying to you.  All the problems in the world come from the myth of Aryan Supremacy.  If you don't believe in God, you think you are God.  And that is sin.

There are Latinos, Asians, and Jews who practice clean faith and live humble lives.  They are the real Israelites.  I hope I can grow my fanbase in South America.  I am sure I am a popular musician there.

So Music and Sport is what I enjoy.  So I will keep doing the work to get the play I want.  That is all I am trying to say.

It's Raining Cats and Dogs

It is fair to analogize that men are like dogs and women are like cats.  The counter-intuitive thing is always true.

Dogs are lovers, peaceful, gentle, and strong.  They are guardians.  They only fight if they have to, to defend their territory or protect their family.  A good man is like a dog.

Cats are by nature warlike.  They fight everyone, feel less emotion, hunt, kill, eat only meat, and spend a lot of time grooming and sleeping.  Cats are warriors.  If you move towards them, they run away, because most good warriors avoid violence unless they have no choice but to defend themselves.

The counter-intuitive thing is always true.  Cats are better fighters than Dogs pound for pound, but dogs are so big that cats seem like a joke in comparison.  But a 50 pound minx can eat a 50 pound pit bull.  Dogs are not a warlike species.  They are guardians, they are primarily designed for protection and living in a group.

God is love.  Dogs are better than Cats.  Dogs were the first domesticated animal, and cats were the last.  So Cats are the most wild.  They are the closest thing to nature in the modern world. 

Men should be like dogs.  Women can't help but be like cats.  They have power.  They don't actually fight with their fists, but they compete in nonviolent ways.  Women compete through appearance, through the status of their boyfriends, through money, through their job, and in other ways.  Women don't dress up to attract men, they dress up to compete with other women.

Women are losers.  But we need them.  In all manners, women are more barbaric than men.  Men are more obvious, they punch you in the face or they tell you fuck you.  But that is kid's stuff.  Women control sex and choose the man.  So we are all just competing for women.

Love is the best feeling in the world.  There is no true love, but there are good relationships and terrible relationships.  The woman chooses the man.  Porno and strippers is just an illusion, where the man chooses the woman and uses her like a lump of meat.

Dating is nothing like porno, sexchat, and strippers.  That is why I haven't dated much.  I can't beat women.  I don't understand their psychology.  Good lovers know how to manipulate women and win the war of the sexes. 

So if I want to learn how to date, I must learn female psychology.  These girls aint loyal.  I am tired of evil sex.  I am ready for a real relationship.  The fulfillment of life is the ideal marriage.  Not perfect, but ideal.  You will never find anything perfect. 

This blog post was an analogy and a study in duality.  I am trying to understand things.  I don't know why I post to this blog, I get nothing from it.  But at least people who read this blog get some education in morality and moral reasoning. 

If I was smart, I would promote my music and books and shut up.  But I am not smart.  I just want to have a ball.